Their Best

Their Best

I have always said that the main goal of a parent is to help a child be the best they can be.  If you are a follower of mine you will have heard me say or seen it written, many times.  Here is a quick video on what I mean by that.  Enjoy and please leave your comments below and we love it when you share posts, videos etc.

 

 

How important are your words?

How important are your words?

We are in a society where social media more than any other form of marketing helps develop our way of thinking. If someone states that you should act ‘a certain way’ or do ‘a certain thing’ by only offering us one side of the story, as a rule, we tend to say, ‘hey that makes sense,’ and we forget to realize there is always more to the story.

I strive to be a balanced person in how I live, how I act and how I treat others. Do I have opinions, hell ya I do, but I try hard not to overreact when someone has a different way of thinking than me?  Everyone is allowed to have different opinions than me, even my children!

But what I don’t think we realize is that how or what we say will influence how our children feel about things.  For example, if you say: ‘You shouldn’t eat this because’ or “isn’t this a terrible thing that happened,’ you are enforcing your opinion on the situation which tends to make your child already feel the same thing you do! It is a minor form of brainwashing. It is a simple fact, and those in marketing know all about it. However, the power we all hold in our hands is too immense to articulate.

I hope that this video blog and all my videos that follow will show you a balanced way of thinking as parents. I know my ideas are not the only conceivable way to think, they are just one way to think. I am hoping to show you how to read between the lines, how to think about how media or other people’s opinions are trying to make you feel and help you develop your own opinion.

Of course, all my videos are my opinions, but I am hoping you will share your views constructively so that we can all learn. So, we can all realize there might be more to any story than we understand and hopefully, that will open our minds to think outside of our own boxes.

Teenage Rape, the story.

Teenage Rape, the story.

There is always more to the story than we know, so now you know the rest of the story for a raped teenager: #1

You get angry when you find out your child is pregnant and your reaction quickly changes to horror when she says she was raped.  Your mind goes in a hundred different directions. You’re not sure what you should do, how you should react. You want to lash out at the rapist, or your daughter, or the world for that matter.  You are just livid because in your perfect little world this should not have happened.

 

Thoughts of the teen who got raped and conceived a child:

  • I guess I shouldn’t have gone to that party.  I don’t know what or how this happened.  I know I was suddenly very sick and very tired and went upstairs. How come I didn’t have enough strength to kick him off me when I realized what he was doing? Who was he? Will I ever know?
  • All my friends are having an abortion, I could go have one and no one would know, but can I? Can I live with that? I was taught it is murder, but is it? The world is telling me I have a choice in this and that it is not murder? How am I to know which is the truth?
  • Will my parents kick me out? If I keep the baby what will become of me and my child?
  • Will they believe that I was raped? I don’t dare tell them I was having sex with my boyfriend and that it could be his or they really won’t believe me that I was raped.
  • If I keep him, how do I deal with being pregnant and knowing most of society is thinking I should have aborted him or at least give him up for adoption?
  • I have to wonder what will become of my child and me being a single mom. Will anyone else ever love me and take me and my child in and love us with all our baggage.

Thoughts of the parent of a child that got raped:

  • I want to kill whoever it was that raped her. I am sick at the pain my child has had to go through.
  • It’s not fair that we have a grandson that people immediately have pity on because of his conception.
  • We have to deal with knowing that even though we did everything in our power to keep our daughter safe; she chose not to listen to us causing her so much pain and hurt. Could we have raised her differently so that she would not have been such a rebel?
  • We have to wonder what will become of her and our grandchild. Will she make it? Will she allow us to help? Will she shut us out of her life? Will she ever find someone to love her and our grandchild the way they both will deserve?

Thoughts of the siblings (aunts and uncles) of the sister that got raped:

  • Cool, I am going to be an aunt/uncle. A baby in the house will be nice.
  • What will my nephew be like, will I even like him, and will I even care. Will I be expected to do more or will I get ignored more now that there is one more person in the house?
  • It’s not fair that there is so much turmoil in the house from yet again the drama queen in the house.
  • We have to deal with seeing our sister and parents upset trying to figure out what to do and how.
  • We have to wonder what will become of all of us with this doom sitting over the house.

Thoughts of the boyfriend of the woman who got raped:

  • Why did I have that fight with her just before that party? It is my fault she got raped. She was so mad at me and that is probably why she went to that stupid party with people she didn’t even know.
  • Is the baby mine, should I stick around even though we fought and she said we are done?
  • Will she abort the baby, do I have a say, how do I handle this, her, the situation. I have no rights as she is saying the baby is not mine, but I know it could be. She is just saying that so her parents will help her.

Click here to watch a video on abortion and what my raped daughter decided to do.

Click here if you are feeling guilt as a parent

Picture: http://www.kemmannu.com/index.php?action=highlights&type=6869