What attitude did you get from your teen today?
I have short words for each attitude and will sometimes call it out as I see it.
- Snotty
- Indifference
- Pissy
- Stubborn
The one I usually get lately is huffy. I think the huff is her favorite attitude. If I ask her to do something, I get a huff. If I suggest she try something I get a huff. If I suggest we do something together, I get a huff. I wonder what she would do if I huffed every time she spoke. Would I then get a double huff back? ‘So I see your huff mom, and I raise you a huff’.
The huff, like most of the attitudes you get, shows that the child thinks you are either:
- stupid
- do not understand
- have no idea
- you must be crazy’.
Teens, you got to love them. This is the time of their life that you want them to remember with joy and yet everything that goes on around them is an annoyance. They do cheer up, of course, they need a ride, or need you to buy them something, or their friends come over.
So the question we all wonder as parents are: What To Do About It?
Years ago, when I thought I knew everything there was to know about parenting which was before I had kids, I would have told you that you can’t let them get away with it. My advice back then would be to speak against the bad attitudes every time. However, my tune has changed after raising four children. Now I believe if the groundwork has been done and they are only giving attitude since they have gotten into their teens, then I would suggest that you let some of the huffs and puffs slide. A big part of this is a stage. Something teens go through. They have finally realized that even though you are their parents, you are still human and you do make mistakes. They have begun to understand that you are not a super mom, and they are discovering some things on their own that you didn’t teach them. They are seeing they are individuals. And with all of that comes a bit of attitude. Do you remember when you discovered your parents weren’t perfect? I’m sure you had some attitude as well.
So what do I suggest you do? I think you should only comment on the attitudes that really matter. What is important enough to you might be different from me, so you might have a different set of rules. But here is a small list of what I would consider important enough to address.
- If they cause other people pain with hurtful words
- If they show extreme disrespect
- If they expect more than they have a right to
If they are huffing and it has nothing to do with an important issue, then choose a different battle to fight and let this one go.
There is a lot more about the ‘teen years‘ in my upcoming book. Read the FREE chapters and let us know what you think.
Raising teens I am sure you have already heard this one ‘You’re mean’. If so watch this video “Mean Parent”